Friday 18 March 2022

Pelosi Slurs Through Speech as She Prepares to Read a Poem About Ukraine by Bono. No, Seriously


After yesterday’s drunk-like speech filled with slurs and unintelligible remarks, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi went out of her way to appear more lucid in front of the media today. 

Apparently, Nancy Pelosi thought reading a poem from Bono would make everyone forget about her embarrassing performance yesterday.

Democrat elite, Nancy Pelosi, has decided that the best possible way for her to aid Ukraine today would be to read poetry from her friend Bono, of U2 fame.  The singer wrote a poem about the ongoing conflict in Ukraine, which, presumably, is designed to inspire patriotism around the world for a nation you do not belong to.

Of course, being a patriot for Ukraine is the only way one is allowed to be a patriot in the mad mind of Pelosi. Regardless, rather than work on pragmatic solutions to the escalating conflict, Bono’s Poetry is Pelosi’s answer.


As if the allure of Bono’s poetry wasn’t enough to get you on board with the Ukraine solution, Pelosi promptly transitions away from the conflict entirely in her meandering speech. Later in her remarks, Pelosi mumbles and slurs her way through a difficult-to-follow demand, explaining that she has told Bidensk for more” of the legislature to support her he needs to “a bipartisanship. She also praises Biden, making numerous claims of how well-received he is internationally, as a “unifier” while in the same breath bragging about a lack of bipartisan support on passed bills. Finally, she closes her press conference with the impossible claims that the “Build Back Better” legislation will fix everything without lending to inflationary pressures.

With the incoherent speaker making incoherent demands to the incoherent president, it’s no wonder that Bono is, apparently, in charge of solving the crisis.

The full speech can be found here:

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